Once seen as the foundation of good leadership, authority and technical skills are gradually being perceived as the tools of “old school leaders”. Technical expertise in an area of expertise is still imensly valuable, but on the other hand, authority is being replaced by empathy. Often dismissed as a mere soft skill, empahty is now redefining what it means to lead effectively in modern organizations. And it’s becoming essential.
Unlike skills that we learn and can apply mechanically, soft skills are usually connected to our emotional intelligence. There are numerous variables associated to soft skills, and one of those variables is what we perceive as our ability to be empathic.
However, empathy transcends the traditional boundaries of soft skills. I strongly believe that it is emerging as a core leadership competency, regardless of the organization or market we work on.
We need new Empathic Leaders
Two decades ago, leadership often relied on strength and authority to command respect. The “do as you’re told” mentality produced results but left teams feeling undervalued and disengaged. Modern leadership, however, thrives on collaboration and emotional intelligence, where every voice matters. Empathy unlocks potential, creating teams that feel heard and valued.
Yet, despite its proven benefits, empathy still carries misconceptions that hold leaders back from fully embracing it.
Is Empathy a Sign of Weakness?
Many still perceive empathy as a weakness, but this perspective is outdated. A leader who does not act with strength and ruthlessness is often seen as vulnerable, someone who will eventually lose control over their team.
However, experience says otherwise and over time, empathy can build strength. A different kind of strength. But how?
Empathy builds trust
By being present and making themselves available to listen, empathic leaders will gradually build a trust bond with each team member.
Remember that everyone has a reason to act the way they do. Sometimes a reaction may seem irrational, but often it originates from hidden struggles or personal challenges.
Taking the time to listen and offer support gradually builds trust. And trust is invaluable.
Empathy improves communication
Trying to understand someone’s point of view and motivations not only drives trust but enhances communication. Opening that channel, often times on topics that are not directly related with the issue at hand, will lead to more fruitful conversations.
You’d be amazed at the great ideas that come out of this kind of open, sincere, conversations.
Empathy drives resilience
Dealing with the daily situations that come and go at a workplace with empathy fosters a healthy team spirit. When a leader is available to hear out the team, their frustrations and ideas, they are gradually, step by step, building an invincible team.
One that won’t even blink when facing tough situations, knowing that they can count on each other to have their backs, working together to find better solutions. And knowing that at the end of the day, they will come out of the issues stronger, more knowledgeable and prepared to face the next challenge.
How to Lead with Empathy
“That’s very nice, but how can I be a more empathic leader?” Great question, glad you asked.
Unfortunately, there’s no definitive answer. After all, it’s emotions we’re talking about. And emotions are subjective by definition, meaning each one of us will react to them differently.
However, there are some things you can work on to be a more empathic leader. Start by cultivating your self-awareness. Yes, if you’re more empathic towards yourself, you’ll start to be more empathic towards others. Questioning our biases and communication habits is a great place to start. To do so, consider using techniques such as journaling, mindfulness or asking for 360-degree feedback.
Listen attentively. If you want someone to feel that you really care about what they are saying, start by listening to them. Really listening: don’t be afraid to summarize key points to make sure you understood correctly, interact during the conversation, keep eye contact. Ask open-ended questions, eliminate distractions, and ensure your full attention is on the speaker (that “urgent” email can wait a couple of minutes…). It will work wonders!
At the same time, try to put yourself in the other’s shoes. Ask about your team member’s challenges, fears and ambitions. Make them explain why they see things the way they do. Switch your perspective with theirs, and you’ll start to understand better their reactions and attitudes.
After all of that, encourage feedback. Your team member’s opinion is pure gold. Whether they are the most recognized senior and expert in their area or the junior that is fresh out of college. Everyone has something to say, and if you give them the chance to express themselves, you’ll be surprised of the gems you can find this way.
Imagine a team member struggling with personal challenges. An empathic leader notices and offers support, which boosts morale and loyalty.
Empathy may be hard, but it works
Empathy isn’t easy to master. And yes, it’s true that sometimes (more often than not), an empathic leader put themselves in a vulnerable position. But by trying to implement it day after day, the results will come. Discuss, listen, share and learn. And repeat.
When I first embraced empathy as a leadership philosophy, it wasn’t easy. But over time, it transformed my teams and my perspective. I kept pushing, learning, and I’m proud to say that my colleagues and I achieved building teams together that we will never forget. Teams that implemented projects where obviously not everything went according to plan. Teams that made mistakes. Teams willing to shed blood, sweat, and tears for our goals, and at the same time trust and confide in each other.
Empathy isn’t just about listening: it’s about connecting, understanding, and building a foundation of trust. While leading with empathy can feel vulnerable at first, the rewards far outweigh the challenges. Empathy transforms teams into resilient, collaborative units prepared to face any challenge together. In the end, there’s no greater accomplishment than fostering a culture of trust, respect, and shared purpose.
In a world where authentic connection is rare, empathy is not just a leadership skill: It shapes organizations, inspires people, and lays the foundation for a better, more collaborative future.